So C's parents are in town this weekend and of course I am going to be busy, busy and busy. But hey this is the life that I have chosen and I am thrilled to be living my dream. This weekend I feel as if I know how to run the grill (my station on the patio) and will have great success in doing so as I did last week.
Last night, A and I had a chat which included Thomas Keller, Roland Henin, how to truss a chicken and where I am going. He feels that I will get there and even told me that he thinks that I pick things up quickly and that when he looks at how they had to bail me out the first weekend and then seeing how I operated the next that if I can continue doing that throughout my career I will be very successful as I am a quick study.
He also suggested that when it is time for me to leave Reservation that I should find a technically demanding Garde Manger job. The idea being that how can you be a chef if you don't know how to do everything; including as I've said washing dishes.
Anyway, just a quick post as I'm off to work.
Thomas Keller once said; “I have no formal culinary training, right.” and nor do I. My Chefs are my formal training and I think that it is serving me better than had I gone to school. The flame is a great teacher.
Have an inspired day and dream big.
A la prochaine
SDM
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Monday, June 9, 2008
You Really Have to Want It (file under things you know but need to know better)
In the last post I ended with the following quote;
“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”
Never has this been more true to me than in the past six months. I had a dream of becoming something honest. Something real, if only to myself, that I could look upon and be proud of. Something that I could look back on when I was eighty years old and say; “YES, I did that!” I have mentioned many times how I feel that cooking is one of the most honest professions in the world because you can’t lie, the food either is good or not, and more importantly is absolutely a reflection of the person that prepared it. This is as true for the person at the corner deli as it is for someone working in a Michelin starred restaurant.
True character is the result of the way that we deal with situations, challenges and obstacles, and the way that we derive knowledge from them. This knowledge would not be quite as good if it were developed in a library or through self study. In my case it is coming through the militaristic kitchen and the general that runs it. You need to suffer, you need to be yelled at, you need to feel that you messed something up and be so ashamed of it that you won’t make the same mistake again.
I have never lacked in character. I have always been hard working and filled with integrity. But now, that I have chosen this, and incidentally do not plan on letting go of ever, I can see that in this case Keller is referring to the character that comes with the painful experiences. Those that are filled with self doubt, admonition, and possibly even shame.
In the last six months I have gone from knowing absolutely nothing about the way that a professional kitchen worked. I have taken a passion that was plain for the world to see and started on a path that will see me open my own restaurant (subject of the next post incidentally). In the kitchen setting it is one thing to be shown how to do something, but it is a whole other ball of wax to have to do that something in a very limited time frame and properly as six people might be waiting for the outcome.
I have learned about myself. I have found that the strength that I have always had is a necessary tool in the arsenal I am developing to be the best Chef in the world. Not only that but in the absence of that strength I would have already fallen victim to the kitchen as so many do.
Part of that character I refer to is that in this pursuit, I am not motivated by some glamorous reward. I don’t think, in fact I know, that there is no restaurant leprechaun with the proverbial pot of gold. There may be a comfortable living and what’s more one which is personally, spiritually, emotionally and mentally rewarding to me but quite possibly nothing more. And for the first time in my life I am comfortable with that.
I think that in the age of food proliferation (as I’ve termed it) in the industrialized world people have come to see these Chefs that are on the food network, etc and they actually think that this is the norm. They think that it is normal for someone to be a Marco Pierre White, a Gordon Ramsay or a Robert Irvine. I’m sure its true in other industries too however I think that in this age of food proliferation people believe that it is as easy as throwing something in a pan, cooking and serving it. What those people don’t see is that most Chefs are up at the crack of dawn at a market somewhere making sure that they get the best ingredients they can. They then develop a menu, discover its potential, figure out the costing, plating, etc. The norm is this not the glamorized, hollywoodized version.
LET ME ASSURE YOU THE KITCHEN IS NOTHING LIKE WHAT YOU THINK!
As I have previously mentioned there are all kinds of people in the kitchen. Some who are just there for the pay cheque (which is kind of comical because in reality the money is shit), there are others there because they love to cook and then there are the limited few like me who actually want there own restaurant. I can count on two fingers the number of people who want their own restaurant in that building right now (not including Executive Chef and Head Chef). A and I are the only ones. And truth be told I know that somewhere down the road he and I will probably be affiliated in some way.
It’s a long hard journey I am on. Everyday is a struggle. A struggle with myself, with my wants and desires, with those things expected of me. But I am the champion of my own destiny and I plan on honouring that as I want to have my own personal success for me. FOR ME.
A and I talk quite frequently and he jokingly pushes me forward by saying; “You know S, you really have to want it. Yeah!” I will say of course and then he’ll say ; “But I’m not sure you really do!”
He says it jokingly but my answer to that is if I didn’t want it why would I subject myself to what I do everyday. I don’t wake up in the morning and question what I am doing. I wake up feeling alive and refreshed and ready to go. AND YOU KNOW WHY, BECAUSE I DO REALLY WANT IT and I KNOW I WILL GET THERE because my character is not being developed in ease and quiet, instead it is developing through the flame, with the fire, with every cut, bruise and burn I get.
Prior to this year I was crippled by self doubt. I was afraid of my potential and myself. Now instead of being afraid of it I embrace it and accept myself for what I am. A hard working man who wants nothing more than to feel the love of his family and friends and to feel at the end of the day that I did something honest and that mattered.
What about you? What do you want?
Henry David Thoreau once said; “Dreams are the touchstones of our character.”
I AGREE.
What is your dream? Have you thought about it today? Did you take a baby step to the elevator? It all starts with just one step…
DREAM BIG AND INSPIRED.
A la prochaine
SDM
“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”
Never has this been more true to me than in the past six months. I had a dream of becoming something honest. Something real, if only to myself, that I could look upon and be proud of. Something that I could look back on when I was eighty years old and say; “YES, I did that!” I have mentioned many times how I feel that cooking is one of the most honest professions in the world because you can’t lie, the food either is good or not, and more importantly is absolutely a reflection of the person that prepared it. This is as true for the person at the corner deli as it is for someone working in a Michelin starred restaurant.
True character is the result of the way that we deal with situations, challenges and obstacles, and the way that we derive knowledge from them. This knowledge would not be quite as good if it were developed in a library or through self study. In my case it is coming through the militaristic kitchen and the general that runs it. You need to suffer, you need to be yelled at, you need to feel that you messed something up and be so ashamed of it that you won’t make the same mistake again.
I have never lacked in character. I have always been hard working and filled with integrity. But now, that I have chosen this, and incidentally do not plan on letting go of ever, I can see that in this case Keller is referring to the character that comes with the painful experiences. Those that are filled with self doubt, admonition, and possibly even shame.
In the last six months I have gone from knowing absolutely nothing about the way that a professional kitchen worked. I have taken a passion that was plain for the world to see and started on a path that will see me open my own restaurant (subject of the next post incidentally). In the kitchen setting it is one thing to be shown how to do something, but it is a whole other ball of wax to have to do that something in a very limited time frame and properly as six people might be waiting for the outcome.
I have learned about myself. I have found that the strength that I have always had is a necessary tool in the arsenal I am developing to be the best Chef in the world. Not only that but in the absence of that strength I would have already fallen victim to the kitchen as so many do.
Part of that character I refer to is that in this pursuit, I am not motivated by some glamorous reward. I don’t think, in fact I know, that there is no restaurant leprechaun with the proverbial pot of gold. There may be a comfortable living and what’s more one which is personally, spiritually, emotionally and mentally rewarding to me but quite possibly nothing more. And for the first time in my life I am comfortable with that.
I think that in the age of food proliferation (as I’ve termed it) in the industrialized world people have come to see these Chefs that are on the food network, etc and they actually think that this is the norm. They think that it is normal for someone to be a Marco Pierre White, a Gordon Ramsay or a Robert Irvine. I’m sure its true in other industries too however I think that in this age of food proliferation people believe that it is as easy as throwing something in a pan, cooking and serving it. What those people don’t see is that most Chefs are up at the crack of dawn at a market somewhere making sure that they get the best ingredients they can. They then develop a menu, discover its potential, figure out the costing, plating, etc. The norm is this not the glamorized, hollywoodized version.
LET ME ASSURE YOU THE KITCHEN IS NOTHING LIKE WHAT YOU THINK!
As I have previously mentioned there are all kinds of people in the kitchen. Some who are just there for the pay cheque (which is kind of comical because in reality the money is shit), there are others there because they love to cook and then there are the limited few like me who actually want there own restaurant. I can count on two fingers the number of people who want their own restaurant in that building right now (not including Executive Chef and Head Chef). A and I are the only ones. And truth be told I know that somewhere down the road he and I will probably be affiliated in some way.
It’s a long hard journey I am on. Everyday is a struggle. A struggle with myself, with my wants and desires, with those things expected of me. But I am the champion of my own destiny and I plan on honouring that as I want to have my own personal success for me. FOR ME.
A and I talk quite frequently and he jokingly pushes me forward by saying; “You know S, you really have to want it. Yeah!” I will say of course and then he’ll say ; “But I’m not sure you really do!”
He says it jokingly but my answer to that is if I didn’t want it why would I subject myself to what I do everyday. I don’t wake up in the morning and question what I am doing. I wake up feeling alive and refreshed and ready to go. AND YOU KNOW WHY, BECAUSE I DO REALLY WANT IT and I KNOW I WILL GET THERE because my character is not being developed in ease and quiet, instead it is developing through the flame, with the fire, with every cut, bruise and burn I get.
Prior to this year I was crippled by self doubt. I was afraid of my potential and myself. Now instead of being afraid of it I embrace it and accept myself for what I am. A hard working man who wants nothing more than to feel the love of his family and friends and to feel at the end of the day that I did something honest and that mattered.
What about you? What do you want?
Henry David Thoreau once said; “Dreams are the touchstones of our character.”
I AGREE.
What is your dream? Have you thought about it today? Did you take a baby step to the elevator? It all starts with just one step…
DREAM BIG AND INSPIRED.
A la prochaine
SDM
The Grill (file under its all about organization)
So my loyal readers, I bid you welcome to the week that was. First off I worked approximately 75 paid hours and another twenty unpaid and chalk on another fifteen in travel time. No wonder I’m so beat. At any rate. This is the weekend that was…
Moving everything from the Restaurant to the Grill is a bit of a pin in the ass. Both literally and figuratively. First off I need to assemble the Tuna Burgers, par cook the regular burgers, get all of the various sauces together, buns, etc and move it across the cobble stones from our building to the patio which is about one hundred meters away. This is done, at least in part, with a crappy old cart which has wheels that fall off and of course is not ideal for doing the task at hand. Then I need to move over my cutting board, fryer baskets, propane tanks, sheet pans, regular pans, all types of containers to keep things in and of course, ketchup, relish and mustard. These are but a few of the things that need to be moved in order to even begin to set up my station.
Friday night was all right. I opened at five (though Chef J wanted me there and ready to go at 4:30). By the time I was actually ready it was about 5:15. I worked solid until 11:30 at the grill and then had to do my breakdown.
Saturday, let hell reign down. Or up as the case were. I got in at 9 am and started working right away. I first thought that the burgers were probably the most important part to get done so I set to work par cooking ten cases of them. This ate up approximately an hour and a half. I then had to portion sauces, cut lettuce and tomato, make quesadillas, etc. I opened on Saturday at approximately 12:15 and went non stop with only two cigarettes the entire day until approximately 11:15 at which point I broke everything down.
Prior to that though the day had a pretty nice rhythm to it and I began to feel a little more comfortable. Once you get the cadence of your movement down the rest just comes down to considerable amounts of coordination and forethought. At one point I had about thirty orders on the go at the same time ranging from Empanadas to Burgers. A couple of times I really found myself so deep in the weeds I could barely think. Both times (around 3 and 5 respectively) Head Chef came and bailed me out. Of course to the uninitiated it looks as if Chef is tearing me a new one unnecessarily but to the uninitiated it would be impossible to understand what Head Chef is doing in the first place. The second time I found myself in the weeds I had announced that I was in the crapper and our pastry Chef heard and called Chef for me. I did not intend to say it out loud and it struck me when she asked if I wanted her to call Chef. He dutifully came over and got me out of the weeds and the whole time was imparting the necessary information I needed in order to manage the details, clean the station, take the chits, etc. All the while his hands were moving and it is a truly glorious thing to see. I HAVE A LOT TO LEARN but am learning things both new and old everyday that I am there. By the end of the night I was beyond spent. My fingers were swollen, I had lost about six or seven pounds due to the heat and I had calluses covering every part of my hand. BUT I LOVE WHAT I DO.
Sunday was again behind the eight ball from the get go. I came in and did all my prep and then proceeded to move everything over to the grill. Head Chef had told me that no matter how deeply I had gotten into the weeds that he COULD NOT come and save me. Nobody could as we were slammed at every restaurant and there were no bodies to spare.
This statement caused me to prepare for the worst and expect the best. Of course when you know from the outset that there is no bailing you out you do things differently. I adjusted the set up, where I kept my Mise en Place, where I accessed things, the grill, everything. I looked at the things that I had to do in order to make my life easier. To make everything move smoothly and with the flow. Naturally, there were a few moments that I was so deep in the weeds that I wished for nothing more than Chef to come and bail me out. But I handled it with good grace and a smile and the people were entertained.
Two things I learned from the experience is how easy it is to get into the weeds and more importantly, how, with a little bit of timing and effort, how easy it is to pull yourself out. I HATE BEING IN THE WEEDS. It messes with my head and starts me doubting things that I shouldn’t me doubting. But when you put yourself on autopilot and let self doubt slip away you’d be amazed what you are capable of accomplishing.
At my worst (or best point depending on your point of view) on Sunday I had about twenty orders going at the same time. If I recall correctly I had twelve burgers, three chicken fingers, two empanadas, two fries and a quesadilla. No big deal you think, save for the fact that the fryer only has two baskets and I had three different items that needed frying and people that were less than willing to wait. But, I started developing a method to deal with this going forward which involves par cooking enough fries for five or six orders and then just splashing them down in the fryer for about thirty to forty five seconds and then serving. Same with the chicken fingers. It seems to work but I still need to do some fine tuning.
We’ll see how we go forward from here. It is a work in progress at any rate. I will be back in a few minutes with another post. But I will leave you with this thought from Helen Keller; “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”
I leave you with this thought because it relates not just to me but also to you and is clearly outlined in the next blog post.
I hope you are all well and loving life because that is the point of our journey on this rock floating through space, to find out who we are, run with and become more.
DREAM BIG AND INSPIRED.
A la prochaine
SDM
Moving everything from the Restaurant to the Grill is a bit of a pin in the ass. Both literally and figuratively. First off I need to assemble the Tuna Burgers, par cook the regular burgers, get all of the various sauces together, buns, etc and move it across the cobble stones from our building to the patio which is about one hundred meters away. This is done, at least in part, with a crappy old cart which has wheels that fall off and of course is not ideal for doing the task at hand. Then I need to move over my cutting board, fryer baskets, propane tanks, sheet pans, regular pans, all types of containers to keep things in and of course, ketchup, relish and mustard. These are but a few of the things that need to be moved in order to even begin to set up my station.
Friday night was all right. I opened at five (though Chef J wanted me there and ready to go at 4:30). By the time I was actually ready it was about 5:15. I worked solid until 11:30 at the grill and then had to do my breakdown.
Saturday, let hell reign down. Or up as the case were. I got in at 9 am and started working right away. I first thought that the burgers were probably the most important part to get done so I set to work par cooking ten cases of them. This ate up approximately an hour and a half. I then had to portion sauces, cut lettuce and tomato, make quesadillas, etc. I opened on Saturday at approximately 12:15 and went non stop with only two cigarettes the entire day until approximately 11:15 at which point I broke everything down.
Prior to that though the day had a pretty nice rhythm to it and I began to feel a little more comfortable. Once you get the cadence of your movement down the rest just comes down to considerable amounts of coordination and forethought. At one point I had about thirty orders on the go at the same time ranging from Empanadas to Burgers. A couple of times I really found myself so deep in the weeds I could barely think. Both times (around 3 and 5 respectively) Head Chef came and bailed me out. Of course to the uninitiated it looks as if Chef is tearing me a new one unnecessarily but to the uninitiated it would be impossible to understand what Head Chef is doing in the first place. The second time I found myself in the weeds I had announced that I was in the crapper and our pastry Chef heard and called Chef for me. I did not intend to say it out loud and it struck me when she asked if I wanted her to call Chef. He dutifully came over and got me out of the weeds and the whole time was imparting the necessary information I needed in order to manage the details, clean the station, take the chits, etc. All the while his hands were moving and it is a truly glorious thing to see. I HAVE A LOT TO LEARN but am learning things both new and old everyday that I am there. By the end of the night I was beyond spent. My fingers were swollen, I had lost about six or seven pounds due to the heat and I had calluses covering every part of my hand. BUT I LOVE WHAT I DO.
Sunday was again behind the eight ball from the get go. I came in and did all my prep and then proceeded to move everything over to the grill. Head Chef had told me that no matter how deeply I had gotten into the weeds that he COULD NOT come and save me. Nobody could as we were slammed at every restaurant and there were no bodies to spare.
This statement caused me to prepare for the worst and expect the best. Of course when you know from the outset that there is no bailing you out you do things differently. I adjusted the set up, where I kept my Mise en Place, where I accessed things, the grill, everything. I looked at the things that I had to do in order to make my life easier. To make everything move smoothly and with the flow. Naturally, there were a few moments that I was so deep in the weeds that I wished for nothing more than Chef to come and bail me out. But I handled it with good grace and a smile and the people were entertained.
Two things I learned from the experience is how easy it is to get into the weeds and more importantly, how, with a little bit of timing and effort, how easy it is to pull yourself out. I HATE BEING IN THE WEEDS. It messes with my head and starts me doubting things that I shouldn’t me doubting. But when you put yourself on autopilot and let self doubt slip away you’d be amazed what you are capable of accomplishing.
At my worst (or best point depending on your point of view) on Sunday I had about twenty orders going at the same time. If I recall correctly I had twelve burgers, three chicken fingers, two empanadas, two fries and a quesadilla. No big deal you think, save for the fact that the fryer only has two baskets and I had three different items that needed frying and people that were less than willing to wait. But, I started developing a method to deal with this going forward which involves par cooking enough fries for five or six orders and then just splashing them down in the fryer for about thirty to forty five seconds and then serving. Same with the chicken fingers. It seems to work but I still need to do some fine tuning.
We’ll see how we go forward from here. It is a work in progress at any rate. I will be back in a few minutes with another post. But I will leave you with this thought from Helen Keller; “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”
I leave you with this thought because it relates not just to me but also to you and is clearly outlined in the next blog post.
I hope you are all well and loving life because that is the point of our journey on this rock floating through space, to find out who we are, run with and become more.
DREAM BIG AND INSPIRED.
A la prochaine
SDM
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
